Do You Know How to Delegate?

Last weekend i found myself in a Strategic Planning seminar. The points that were raised were mostly applicable to organizations - whether it's a business, a church or other non-profit organizations. But when the speaker started talking about delegating, it struck me as a parenting lesson.

Are we, as parents, confident enough to delegate responsibilites to our children? It easier when our children are already adults. We endorse business decisions and other important responsibilities to them. But how about the younger ones? I gues the question we should ask ourselves is "how early should we start delgating responsibilites?"

When we were discussing delation during the seminar, the speaker explained that when we delegate, we must allow for a certain level of risk. But what is important is that the risks associated with the task is calculated. This means that you can easily recoup most of the damage should something go wrong. Likewise, the responsibilites that we delegate to our children should also be calculated based on their age. We give them responsibilites but make sure that it is age appropriate. More importantly, we should also ensure that the consequences of failure will not be life threatening. 

One of the things that Dens and i have recently talked about is allowing our kids to commute in the future. Dens is convinved that he does not want our kids to grow up dependent on private transportation. I agree with Dens 100 percent.  But there is a struggle within this paranoid mommy to allow for them to commute at such a young age.  Perhaps when they're 30?  Okay fine, 25?  I feel like allowing them to commute at a young age is like sending them off to war unprepared.  Dens started to commute when he was in gradeschool and i cannot imagine doing the same for my kids.  I told him maybe the first time Troy or Dawn will take the jeep, i will be trailing behind in our car. Dens didn't find it very funny. Maybe because he knew i was serious.

It's never easy to let go.  When we hold on to these parental responsibilites, our children will grow up in a very sheltered environment that will not allow them to thrive in the real world. It's important that we start delegating small responsibilities to them while they're young. It really does not have to be something big right away. For example, my 2-year old daughter is tasked to always pack her things away after she plays. She also helps me fix things at home and is always reminded to close the door after herself each time she leaves a room.  With my 5-year old, we often remind him to try to do things himself first before asking for help. When we watch movies in our TV room, he has learned to get water by himself.  Most of the time he would even get water for everyone else while he is at it.  Sometimes, other friends and family members would get anxious when they see Troy holding the pitcher because he might drop it and make a mess. For me, that's quite all right. Yes, he may spill the water sometimes but that's part of learning. In fact, he already knows to clean up after himself should that happen...in which case it becomes another teaching opportunity.  Again, the risk involved in the given responsibility is not life threatening so that is fine.

Maybe in a couple of years, i will be braver and allow my children to take the jeep. Until then, we will continue to train them at home and win these small battles. Maybe next time we will be ready for the war.

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Of Soccer Dreams and Faith Goals

Remember one of  my old blog posts about Troy's flat-foot? (Read about it here). Because of it, the ortho-pedia that we met a few years ago told us that Troy should not participate in any sport that involves a lot of running.

Last year when we visited Troy's school, he saw some older kids playing soccer. He told me afterwards that when he grows up, he also wants to play soccer like them. I said 'why not?'.  I know that medically it may seem difficult for Troy to truly be good at soccer because of his foot. But i also believe that God is greater than any medical limitation. For all I know, maybe God introduced us to Dr Kong so that we can start correcting Troy's foot problems early on!

Ever since Troy told me his dream to play soccer, i've added it to my list of faith goals. This concept was shared with me by one of my friends. Unlike the regular goals that we set for ourselves, faith goals are those that are impossible to achieve with our current resources. It is a goal that can only be achieved through faith in the Lord.

I know that Troy's heart's desires may still change. Maybe just six months from now he'd like to play basketball or baseball instead. But either way, i would like him to have the option to play the sport that he loves. This world may give us limitations but we pray to a God who is limitless! Wonderful, isn't it?

Now, what about you? What is your faith goal?

Hebrews 11:1
"Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see"

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Healthy Shoes! Free Foot Assessment at Dr Kong

Ever since Troy was around 2 years old, he'd often wake up middle of the night crying of knee pains.  After doing my own research, i initially self-diagnosed it to be growing pains.

Wikipedia describes growing pains as "Pain symptoms relatively common in children. Typically, they are located in the muscles, rather than the joints, of the leg and less commonly the arm. They are usually felt on both sides, and appear late in the day or at night, waking the child, with pain varying from mild to very severe. Pain is absent by the morning, and there are no objective clinical signs of inflammation. Pain can recur nightly or be absent for days to months. Growing pain is not associated with other serious disease and usually resolves by late childhood, but frequent episodes are capable of having a substantial effect on the life of the child.^"

*You can read more about growing pains here.

It sounded like what Troy has except that his pains radiates from his knee (hence, joints) and it only occurs on his right leg and not both which is common to growing pains. The paranoid mommy in me was really concerned that it may be a sign of something more serious so we decided to schedule a visit to a pedia-chiropractor.

After doing several motor-skill tests, she advised us that one of Troy's foot was flat-footed. With much running throughout the day, it was expected that his knee would take a lot of beating and get sore at night. She said that kids with flat feet sometimes outgrow them eventually.  However, in the event that they don't,  it won't be advisable for Troy to engage in any sport that involves a lot of running.  Otherwise he may often experience knee pains afterwards.  I was relieved that it wasn't any serious illness but was a bit saddened that my very active son may not be able to play competitive sports that involved much running (i.e. basketball, soccer, etc).

Our temporary solution whenever he experiences pain is to massage the area or put a hot compress (we use the microwavable kind) on top of his knee. This will often help him get back to sleep.

A few weeks ago, my dad was telling me he had a foot diagnosis done at Dr. Kong. My dad shared that he was somehow relieved of his foot pain after using a Dr. Kong pad that was prescribed to him. I thought it may be the answer to my prayers and brought Troy to their branch at Robinsons Magnolia last weekend.



Measuring foot alignment



Foot stamp to check your arch







Troy's stamp shows he is flat-footed

They recommended a pair of rubber shoes that has a strong back and high arch for Troy. I knew that they were not just  pushing their products since I also did the assessment and they said there is nothing wrong with my feet. I wasn't really encouraged to buy anything.

We got Troy a pair of rubber shoes which was on sale (some children shoes are still on 50% off now). You can then take out the sole and place them in the other shoes to make them more orthopedic-friendly as well.

The pair we got is said to help build Troy's foot arch and assist him to outgrow having a flat foot (yes, it can apparently still self correct with kids). I am praying and hoping this will solve his midnight knee pains and allow him to play active sports in the future. They also sell insoles for adults who experience chronic foot, leg, and back pains.

Do visit their Facebook page to check out their shoe designs. I know they have branches in Robinsons Galleria, Robinsons Magnolia, and Robinsons Ermita.

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