Breastfeeding Rocks

I am a big fan of breastfeeding. I breastfed Troy for almost 2 years and Dawn for over 3 years. While I am an advocate of breastfeeding, I do not discount the fact that other moms just could not do the same for various reasons. And that's all right too.

I would like to share this video from #theperfectlatch campaign for breastfeeding. Here's to all moms out there who do our best for our children - through breastfeeding or otherwise.

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The Day I Became a Person and a Half

It was around six in the morning when the nurses came and wheeled me to the operating room. After waiting for over 38 weeks, I was very excited to meet my little girl...and, quite frankly, also looking forward to relieving myself from the weight that has been causing me sleepless nights and lower back pains. After a little over an hour, our beautiful baby girl was born. 72 hours later, i felt pregnant again.

Being our second baby (technically 3rd but that's another story), we felt like seasoned parents. We knew how to fix our breastfeeding schedule and prepare ourselves for the midnight shifts. But my daughter was different from her brother somehow. She was so attached to me (and no one else) like a stick to a glue.  When she cries in the middle of the night, she only wanted me to carry her. When i let her co-sleep with us on the bed, she'd prefer to sleep on my tummy instead. When we're out, she'd cuddle inside the sling 99% of the time. It was, in a way, easier for me since she was quick to pacify. The only problem was, the only effective pacifier was me.

Almost three years later, nothing has changed. Last December we had a 2-week vacation abroad and my daughter only wanted me to give her a bath, feed her, brush her teeth, carry her [sling or no sling], and even push her stroller.  That's right, push her stroller!  She'll check the back every now and then to make sure no one else has 'taken over' the stroller. I must admit feeling so loved and needed by your child is awesome in a lot of ways. But during those times when i just wanted to rest, it can get pretty stressful and literally back-breaking. Like i said, with the sleepless nights and backaches, it didn't feel too different from being pregnant.

I remember trying to shop in H&M with Dawn. I didn't want to let her walk around (and have to run after her) so i carried her most of the time.  There was an ongoing sale so the crowd was tight and the lines were long.  It was challenging to say the least.  So one afternoon, Dens decided i needed a break.  He took Dawn from me - amidst the tears and all (Dawn, not me) - so that i can go shopping for an hour with my sister. We excitedly ran to the nearest H&M to continue our shopping - leisurely this time. When i got there, the excitement started to fade away. I saw the clothes that i tried on when Dawn was with me and remembered how excited she looked when she said 'Mom, you look like a princess!' Then i saw the little hair accessories that Dawn diligently collected the first time we were there. She said some of those were for her and some were for me. Suddenly, my afternoon of leisure shopping wasn't as fun as i thought.  It truly felt like giving birth. Once the baby is out, you somehow feel like a part of you is now missing.

This made me realize to enjoy the present. Being a mom will surely limit my shopping habits once in a while. I may not be able to shop to my heart's content in factory outlets anymore. I may need to say goodbye to a  restful 8-hour sleep until they're all grown up. I may not always get to enjoy my meals as I make sure the little toddler is eating enough. But that's all right. The perks of being a mom far outweighs the challenges. The smiles you get each time you open your eyes in the morning. The embraces at night before you sleep. And the 'i love you's' that they so sincerely say.

I wonder how long my daughter will be this attached to me. But i will stop analyzing how to 'detach' her anymore. I will embrace this moment for as long as i can. Because not too long from now, she will have her own life...her own schedule...and she may not need me as much as she does now. And i will look back to this day with fondness and a deep sense of longing. Hoping that time did not have to move so fast.

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The First Time I Met My Children

Do you still remember the first time you  met your children? I do. It was very different for all three of them. I'd like to share my story with you.

I still vividly remember the first time I was about to meet Tyler. I was filled with anxieties since i was already told that he had paralysis on the left side of his face. Fears of not being able to accept his deficiencies troubled me as i slowly entered the NICU. The moment i laid my eyes on him, i thought to myself "He's perfect". I felt that he was the most beautiful baby i have ever seen. After that initial impression, thoughts of his condition started to sink in. And i broke down in that NICU. It was the day we were checking out of the hospital. I cried all the way home wondering how many days his crib will remain empty.  I knew nothing then of what lied ahead of us in the coming months.

My pregnancy with Troy was the most joyful one. I had very little morning sickness and i was happy most of the time. We prayed for a little boy.  More than the blue-decorated nursery in our house, I knew that since we lost Tyler, there is that longing in my heart to be a mother to a healthy baby boy. God saw my heart and answered our prayers. I felt very connected with Troy during my pregnancy. I would talk to him and read stories to him. I already 'knew' him even before he was born. Then March 7 came and i gave birth to Troy. Dens wheeled me to the nursery, 24 hours post surgery, to breastfeed Troy.  I was about to meet him for the first time (save for those few glimpses that i had in the operating room).  I excitedly waited in the breastfeeding room for him. It felt like meeting Dens again for the first time after over a month of talking daily over the phone (but that's another story). I wondered how he looked like and how he would react to me. Then the nurse came in with Troy.  He was bundled in a light blue blanket and was handed over to me. I carried him and looked at him. My first thought was 'Oh wow, he's so beautiful.' I also remember thinking how he amazingly looks so much like Tyler.  I kept looking at him and cannot seem to fathom that this perfect little baby that i am carrying is my own.  Then i started to struggle with the concept of motherhood. What was i supposed to say to him now?  What do i do with him?  It was a concept i cannot seem to  immediately grasp. I felt disconnected somehow. It did truly feel like the first time i met Dens in person. There was a brief moment of awkwardness even though we were already so close over the phone. But just like that, the awkward feeling immediately went away. Tears started to form as i  continued to look at this baby who also stared back at me. He is so healthy. He is my child.  I held him tighter and i felt my heart swell with so much love and pride. I was filled with gratitude for this gift of life. I was officially a mom again.

Dawn came three years later.  During my pregnancy, I often felt tired and i hardly had the chance to read stories to Dawn. I was also busy doing my online shopping for girls' clothes and conducting surveys for girls' names more than anything. I was just excited to have a girl added to our small family.  The day after I gave birth to Dawn was the first time I was to meet her in person. I found myself waiting excitedly in that same breastfeeding room once again. I looked around the room and saw the familiar breastfeeding pumps and storage bags. They did not feel foreign anymore. I felt more at ease. Then the nurse came in with this tiny baby wrapped in a baby pink blanket.  And it felt different the this time. Even though i did not feel any connection during pregnancy, i somehow immediately felt drawn to her the moment i laid my eyes on her.  One look at her and i knew she was my child. My first thought was "She's so pretty!" I couldn't believe a baby can already look gender-specific. She truly looked like a girl.  I looked at her and i felt complete. She was another answer to my prayers. Another prophecy fulfilled. I was just amazed.

Meeting our children for the first time can come in different forms. Some of you may feel that instant connection like i did with Dawn, while others may also struggle with the idea of mothering a child like i did with Troy. Regardless of how your first meeting will become, one thing is certain.  It will all lead to this feeling of pure and unconditional love.  A love so fierce that overwhelms you.  And from that moment on,  you will stay in love forever. 



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My Babypalooza Experience

So last weekend was tiring but productive.  My friend Candy and i sold a lot of used/unused pre-loved items at the Babypalooza Bazaar. I got there around 9:00am and was done setting up before 9:30am. The bazaar officially opened at 10:00am.

Candy, our little seller Kimi, and me

The venue was at the 2nd floor of the Walter Hogan Hall within the Ateneo compound.  The bazaar was a mix of branded (new) items and pre-loved ones. I saw a lot of my online friends there and met some new ones too!

Here is a quick run down of the booths i've visited.

Tickled Moms sold some really nice mesh baby pouches. I like that the fabric is quick-drying and breathable. So perfect for a day in the beach with your little ones.

I saw Paola of MommyTreats there too! Paola makes the best brownies ever! All her treats are meant to increase milk supply for breastfeeding moms.  It's really so delicious that i'm pretty sure i will continue to order even when i've stopped breastfeeding my little girl. I got to try the peppermint brownies during the event and it was sooo good! You can check out Paola's site and order from her here.

My sister, Tammy, of Spunkdesigns also had a booth there. Tammy sells the cutest little trinkets that are perfect as gifts to friends or giveaways during your events.  All the items are so cute you'd want to keep them for yourselves! You can visit her site here or like her facebook page to get regular updates here

I also met Helen of Hatch & Latch during the event. I've ordered the very effective More Milk Plus capsules from her before but we've never met in person.

I also came across Smart Steps during the bazaar. They sell detergent and bottle cleansers that are safe for babies. I personally haven't used it but some of you may be interested.

I actually got the mosquito patches since they have really unique designs that my kids love! I got baby avengers for Troy and Disney princess for Dawn.

There were so many stores selling adorable and affordable items. I had to stop myself from shopping those two days. I had to remind myself that i was there to dispose of old things and not hoard new ones.

Cute mommy & baby matching clothes



Babypalooza's Celeste and her husband



 Event styling by Red Riding Hood

Sole Gifts & Novelties

I initially felt that the traffic of people coming in was very slow.  But at the end of the first day, i was able to empty two out of three of our luggage-full-of-stuff already! And on the 2nd day, we were able to sell our stroller, car seat, and high chair plus another load of stuff. Since my mission was to free up storage space while making some money out of it, i believe it's safe to say that my weekend was truly very successful!

Not only is the event a good venue to sell your pre-loved items, it's also a great way to network with other entrepreneurs for your businesses.
I look forward to the next Babypalooza event and hope to still be able to join if my schedule permits. Hope to see you there too!

Happy week ahead, everyone!

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Fresh Milk Delivered to Your Doorstep!

After weaning from breastmilk at 20 months, my son immediately moved to drinking fresh milk everyday. At 4 years old, he can finish about 5 to 6 tetra packs (9oz) of fresh milk a day. Given the sheer volume of milk that he consumes, i have been contemplating on ordering fresh milk (not the tetra packed kind) for a while now but never really acted on it.

During a recent luncheon, i was introduced by lifestyle blogger, Rowena, to a fresh milk delivery company. I did not waste any more time and immediately searched for them online and ordered that same day.

The company that produces the milk is Batangas Agribusiness Center.  They supply to some of the biggest coffee houses and food chains in Metro Manila plus a number of residences. The good news is that you can now contact their Manila delivery arm and have the fresh milk delivered straight to your doorstep!

They have whole milk, non-fat milk, and chocolate milk. They also have some non-dairy products that you can order such as juices and bread. Check out their Facebook page at http://www.facebook.com/Milkman888 for the complete product listing.

Fresh milk tastes more creamy than tetra-packed milk. I haven't tried the other variants but i heard that the non-fat milk tastes more watered-down.  It makes sense since the fat has already been reduced so i guess it would be less creamy.

At the moment, it will not fully replace our tetra-packed milk which is very convenient to bring when we're out. But at least a big part of my son's milk consumption will be fresh milk.

Call them now at 0927-8335000 to place your orders. A 2-liter jug costs P180 and you only need to order a minimum of 4-liters (2 jugs of 2-liters) for them to deliver. It is not advisable to order too much since fresh milk spoils easily (around 4 to 5 days only).

It's time to go back to basics. Taste the difference.

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From Mommy with Love

Being a working mom means that i have to constantly balance my time between the corporate world and my family. One question that i get asked a lot is 'How do you do it?'.  The quick answer is - i just do what i have to do. I do my best while i am at work and try to be the best mom I can be while I'm with my kids. But sometimes, the time with your kids is so limited when you get home, right?

I would like to share three simple things that i do to compensate for the 9 to 10 hours that i have to spend at the office each day.

1. Write Letters to My Children

I keep both online and hardbound journals for my kids. I write to them each time I have things that i want to tell them that i simply cannot because they are either away from me or are still too little to understand. I have two separate notebooks for each of my kids.  I have recently accepted that my handwriting is just terrible. What's the point of getting all sentimental with handwritten stuff when they cannot even understand it in the first place? So i am now posting my thoughts and letters to them in an online journal.

I love this because it is something i intend to share with them when they are older. They will be able to read about all the funny anecdotes that they've said and all the things that we have done for them. I want them to grow up remembering how much we love them.  I wrote about these letters in an old post here.


Moleskin books for Troy and Dawn

  

I would paste memorable photos on some pages

2.   Travel! Travel! Travel!

Vacation leaves are there for a reason. Use them wisely! 99% of my vacation leaves are spent with my children. Either on an extended family vacation (some examples of my family travel posts here, here, here, or here) or simply going to the local mall. It does not have to be extravagant. It just has to be memorable and fun.  I am a firm believer that we must invest our money wisely but also enjoy the fruits of our labor. 

Now i say 99% of the time because there are still that 1% of the time when i just want to enjoy some ME time and go to the Spa, rest at home, or just do whatever i want. And that's okay too.

3. Be their 'Yaya'

At this day and age, a lot of the chores are being done by the nannies. I also enjoy that luxury and am truly grateful for whatever help i can get. But with the kids, i realize that most children equate love with the things we do for them (a.k.a. taking care of them).  So even when we are tired from a long day at work, Dens and i see to it that we do at least one 30-minute activity with each of our children separately each day.

My daily activity with Troy is bath time.  Troy will always tell me about how his day went during this time. It helps me get to know him more.  Troy, in turn, will know that even if mommy is working the whole day, it is also important for me to take care of him when i get home.

Dens would then takeover after that. Their activities would range from playing basketball to reading story books before bedtime.

With Dawn it gets a little bit easier for me since i still breastfeed her exclusively.  After Dawn's bath, I would usually bring her upstairs to play in Troy's room.  This is also a good chance for all four of us to spend time together.  By 9pm, I would bring her back to our room, feed her and put her to sleep.

Although the above routine is our ideal, the schedule does get interrupted once in a while. There are days when we need to attend Bible studies or simply want to go out for a movie date, and that is all right. We wil just go back to our routine the next day.

Being a working mom does not mean you are automatically detached from your kids. As i have shared, it is still possible to be very hands-on.

I admit that there are days when i want to just stay home and spend all 24 hours with them...but for now, i will do the best with my situation and enjoy both career and motherhood. It has been working for me and I hope it can work for you working moms too!

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Breastfeeding

I have been a breastfeeding advocate ever since i got pregnant the first time. I breastfed Tyler for 2+ months which is practically his entire lifetime. With Troy, i was able to breastfeed him for a year and 8 months. Dawn is now 6 months old and I'm planning to breastfeed her for at least 2 years.

A lot of moms have said that they had to stop breastfeeding because they went back to work. That shouldn't be the case.  It takes a lot of commitment to be able to breastfeed exclusively but the benefits far outweigh all the sleepless nights. 

When Troy was 4 months old, i had to fly to New York for a business trip. I was determined not to let him try any formula milk so i diligently expressed milk in the office and in between his nightly feedings. I was in New York only a few days because I had to fly to Singapore the week after for another business trip. That was followed a another business trip to Australia a month after.

In between my trips, I had to restock the frozen milk supply in time for the next trip out. It was tiring but i wouldn't have it any other way.

With Dawn, I am a bit wiser. I started stocking milk as soon as we came home from the hospital. It didn't matter that i didn't have any pending business trips yet, I wanted to make sure she will get enough in case i had to fly out. We already have a stock full of milk now and I have also been helping some friends by donating milk to them. I will have some trips scheduled in the next few months but I am not as concerned anymore.

Bottom line is that it's possible to go back to the corporate world and still be exclusively breastfeeding. You can even take numerous business trips so long as you'd be diligent in expressing and stocking your milk supply.

Here are what worked for me:

• Remember supply and demand. The more you express milk or feed your baby, the more your body will produce milk.
• Drink lots of liquid. It doesn't even have to be soup as most people say. Just carry around a big bottle of water and drink whenever you can.
• Eat well. You need the energy to produce milk. Don't worry! Expressing milk is like doing cardio exercises.
• Relax when you're feeding your baby or expressing milk. Stress inhibits milk letdown and would make you assume you don't have milk anymore.
• Pray! Pray! Pray! God is our source!

Philippians 4:13 "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me"

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The Past 16 Months

It’s been over a year since I last blogged. So this post is to update you on what’s you’ve missed the past 16 months.

ü  We now have a baby girl!!! Dawn was born on February 22 of this year weighing a tiny 4.13lbs.

ü  Had a horrific experience of having my stitches open again after having my 3^rd c-section. It finally closed after several torturous wound-cleaning visits to my OB. I always say I have a pretty high tolerance for pain and had always been proud that am easily up and about after my c-sections...so the pain of having my wound re-open was probably my true ‘birthing pain’ experience.

ü  Troy started going to school last year and he has been enjoying it! We had about 5 days of crying due to separation anxiety but after that, it was pretty nice and easy. He easily made new friends in school and has been loving after-school playground time A LOT! Removing playground time became the most effective punishment last year.

ü  In line with starting school, I am now a full-time tutor to Troy. My husband, Dens, and I have been spending at least 30 mins daily to help Troy with his homework. It’s been crazy fun – a lot of trial & error on tutoring styles along the way.

ü  Travel! Travel! Travel! Boracay, Davao, Japan, Australia, China…you can see my contribution in manilamommy’s post on my tips for travelling with a baby/toddler .  This year has been an even greater challenge travelling with 2 kids in tow. Dawn has been to Boracay and Davao and will soon have her first trip abroad in 2 months.

ü  I’m once again breastfeeding and aiming for 2 years this time. I breastfed Troy for exactly a year and 8 months before and I am hoping I can do the additional 4-month stretch with Dawn.

So that’s where we left off and this is where our story begins…

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After 12 Months

Troy just turned one last Saturday. I realized that through the past 12 months, there have been a lot of changes in our lives. Some subtle, some major - but changes nonetheless. 

• Our regular Friday night movie/dinner dates are not so regular anymore. We still make it a point to spend time by ourselves at least once a week. But instead of our usual Rockwell or Greenbelt dates, we opt to just order pizza and watch a nice DVD at home while Troy is sleeping in the other room. 
• I cannot be out longer than normal after work since i have to rush home and bring the expressed breastmilk for troy. This means 99% less impromptu dates and gimmicks with friends. Most things have to be scheduled and planned well in advance - how long will we be out? will there be a ref in the venue? if not, who can bring the milk home first? 
• Decaf please! Since i am still breastfeeding Troy exclusively, i need to continue watching what i eat. In a way it's like staying pregnant a year after giving birth. You still have to follow some of the do's and don'ts of a pregnant woman. 
• No more 8 hours of sleep. For some reason (it may be due to how breastmilk is easily digested or just the way i have trained Troy), he still wakes up in the middle of the night. Not so much to feed anymore but just to transfer to our bed (from his crib). Once he falls back asleep, then we have to transfer him back to his crib. On more exciting nights, he refuses to go to sleep and would want to keep on playing with anything he gets his hands on. Even with the lights out, he practically knows where my cellphone is placed (he looooves playing with my cellphone) and knows how to get his parents up from our 'pretend-sleep' just by rolling over to our feet. Dens and i would practically jump up at the same time fearing that Troy would fall over the bed. 
• I love fashion! ...but dressing up takes a back seat to what outfit is more convenient for breastfeeding. 
• Fashion flaw #2 - no more potentially dangerous accessories. My mom already had 2 pearl-necklace-casualties c/o her grandson...not so mention the frigtening idea of having Troy swallow one of the pearls when the string breaks! You wouldn't believe how fast kids are when putting non edible items into their mouths. I have torn magazines and receipts with holes in them to prove that. 
• Vacation leaves can actually be more physically exhausting then actually going to the office. When i'm at home, it's very hard to resist the tempation of foregoing things that you actually need to do and just spend time with your son. Leaves where you plan to accomplish things on your to-do list become less and less productive. I always end up taking the opportunity to feed Troy his breakfast/lunch, giving him a bath and simply enjoying the day with him. Things that i rarely get to do when i am at work. This is specifically why i am 8 months behind in making Troy's month-by-month scrapbook. 
• Say goodbye to 'travel light'. Pre-motherhood, i would always proudly check on the bags of my other companions and compare them to my very small pack. I have mastered the art of packing lightly...until Troy came along. With a baby, you always need to think of the 'extras'. Extra clothes, extra diapers, extra everything! Before your know it, your bag for the 3-day trip to Tagaytay is now looking more like you're migrating to Canada! We always want to be sure even though there are groceries in the place we will be visiting. The mindset of a parent packing for a child is that we will be vacationing inside a cave where there is nothing else in it but us. Survivor, here we come!

A lot of women would stop and say 'i miss doing this and that' - things that you easily get to do when you were not yet a mom. And i will not be honest if i say i don't miss sleeping for 8 hours straight or having a really productive day at home.  But all of these things can wait while i enjoy seeing Troy grow up and become the person that God intends for him to be. I think that's the joy of motherhood. You may be missing out on a lot of things...but it's okay.


[Blogged on March 11, 2009]

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